The other day I read an article about the attractiveness of humility and it got me thinking.

Is it true? Where is the line between arrogance, cocky, self-assured, humble, and false humility? We know it differs by gender. Men can state what they know unequivocally, while women are expected to down play their abilities.

If we move around gender for a second, how do you feel about this? If a woman comes across as cocky, as someone who says she’s good at stuff without reservation, who doesn’t downplay her skills and lets you know that, does she make you back away? Or does it draw you to her?

If a woman doesn’t acknowledge her skills, if she barely mentions her skills or work even though you know they’re extensive, does it feel false? Does it make you trust her less? Or do you like that?

Where is the middle ground, and why are we drawn to those who stand there? Why do we love the characters in books and films who straddle that place between being good at stuff but not being blustery about it?

According to a Forbes article: Humble people are still self-efficacious; they just don’t feel the impetus to boast about themselves but instead, let their actions speak for their ideals. To be humble is not to think less of oneself, but to think of oneself less.

I don’t have any answers to these questions. I’m just pontificating. Any thoughts?